Ahoy there shipmate!

Shiver me timbers, first the treasure of English football comes under attack from UEFA President Michel Platini, and now our clubs are being labelled pirates.

Italian clubs Palermo and Reggina have broken out in support of Platini’s remark that English clubs are poaching the best European talent before they even pull on the shirt of the club that has nurtured them. This in turn is of detriment to the development of young English players who barely get the chance to shine in the Premiership.

Give us a link, Sam?

Listening to Radio 5 Live this morning, I was delighted to hear the words “Midtable” and “Mediocrity” together in a sentence.

Mark Benton (the Nationwide advert King) was talking to Sam Delaney about his beloved Middlesbrough team and Sam posed the question as to who was the better midtable team…well there was only likely to be one answer from the Teeside lad.

But fancy mentioning Midtable Mediocrity and not giving us a credit?! And to add insult to injury there was a glaring error – clearly Spurs are the best (yet mediocre) midtable team.

Listen to the podcast from the show here http://downloads.bbc.co.uk/podcasts/fivelive/eamonn/rss.xml

And seen as we have mentioned him, a little clip of Mark in one of the few good commercials swamped in a bog of mediocre ones. 

This mediocrity thing is spreading…

If I created a blog for mediocre international teams, England would certainly be in it.

A blog for mediocre international teams…I sense branching out!

The headlines were always going to be about David Beckham as he collected his 100th cap in his accustomed position of right midfield. Alas we should have known better – Becks has always delighted in surprising us, from mohicans and tattoos to raising national awareness of the metatarsal. Tonight was no disappointment. In an upset to the BBC’s predicted team formation, Becks eased into his century appearance from the comfort of right-back. It was enough to make Motty’s coat baa.