Give us a link, Sam?

Listening to Radio 5 Live this morning, I was delighted to hear the words “Midtable” and “Mediocrity” together in a sentence.

Mark Benton (the Nationwide advert King) was talking to Sam Delaney about his beloved Middlesbrough team and Sam posed the question as to who was the better midtable team…well there was only likely to be one answer from the Teeside lad.

But fancy mentioning Midtable Mediocrity and not giving us a credit?! And to add insult to injury there was a glaring error – clearly Spurs are the best (yet mediocre) midtable team.

Listen to the podcast from the show here http://downloads.bbc.co.uk/podcasts/fivelive/eamonn/rss.xml

And seen as we have mentioned him, a little clip of Mark in one of the few good commercials swamped in a bog of mediocre ones. 

This mediocrity thing is spreading…

If I created a blog for mediocre international teams, England would certainly be in it.

A blog for mediocre international teams…I sense branching out!

The headlines were always going to be about David Beckham as he collected his 100th cap in his accustomed position of right midfield. Alas we should have known better – Becks has always delighted in surprising us, from mohicans and tattoos to raising national awareness of the metatarsal. Tonight was no disappointment. In an upset to the BBC’s predicted team formation, Becks eased into his century appearance from the comfort of right-back. It was enough to make Motty’s coat baa.

King Kev all at sea on the Tyne

Messiah: Promised deliverer (Oxford Dictionary)

The King may have returned to St James’ Park but the jewels are not shining in the Messiah’s crown. Did Kevin Keegan believe that Newcastle were one attacking display away from a goal-fest of yesteryear? If he did, he was sadly deluded.

The sleeping giant of the north-east has never been in such a deep coma. True, they possess a defence resembling Humpty Dumpty’s wall but they are also blessed with players of international quality. The likes of Michael Owen, Alan Smith, Obafemi Martins, Nicky Butt, Mark Viduka, Damien Duff and James Milner have the so-called “X Factor”